notevensorey | IC Inbox

[Sorey sees the surprise, and Mikleo trying to protest it, but then the seraph thanks him instead.]

Wonderful! Then I've been blessed this day.

[His eyes soften a little.]

You did a bang-up job. This is something to be proud of.

[His friend's joke does still earn a quiet chuckle from the brunet, but... he can tell that his heart isn't really in it. So Sorey waits for Mikleo to speak again, and the question makes his heart hurt a little.]

I can say it's real until I'm blue in the face, but words aren't enough, are they? [Mikleo seems like the type to prefer actions. Something tangible that he can see or touch.] Whatever proof you need that this is, in fact, real, I'll give to you.

I don't know about proud, but I like having the space. [His quarters were always so spartan before this, like he was afraid of settling in. But he isn't sure how long he'll be with Jun, and he actually wants to relax a little now that he has the time (and has to adhere to a normal person sleeping schedule), so... here it is. It's nothing like his old room he had as a teenager, but he's not sure recreating that would help anyone, honestly.

He pushes that out of his mind and focuses on the present. Yet another token of an old life, a much older life, now stands before him. Mikleo had dreamed of this day for a little over a decade, but that didn't prepare him... not for any of it.

He looks at Sorey and his memories fill in with the details before him. The small rounded bit of his nose, cheeks softer, a jaw not yet chiseled... but the resemblance is obvious. Not a boy, but a man, yet still wearing the same dangly feathered earrings he had as child.

Mikleo closes his eyes for a moment. He doesn't need to breathe but he still does it to steady himself, because all of the emotions he's carried with him across two worlds have all clambered to the surface to remind him of how lonely he's been.]

... Give me your hand.

[Mikleo can't ask for Sorey to remember his true name, but Mikleo will surely know by the feeling of the hand that he held in his for years.]

Edited 2023-03-05 03:27 (UTC)

[Sorey waits patiently for Mikleo. He doesn't remember as much as his friend does, and he's beginning to see why. He's walking a much different path than his past life did, unable to trigger those memories. Rather than wandering ruins and remembering the echoes of Sorey's past, Slade has gone in a different direction. History has become his hobby rather than his passion, his life, his career.

Despite that, or perhaps because of it, the brunet isn't going to let that stop him from reaching out and reconnecting with Mikleo. No matter their experiences in this life, he's certain that they're still the same people at their core.

So when the seraph asks for his hand, Sorey doesn't hesitate. He reaches out to take Mikleo's hand. Definitely platonic handholding, even if he is marveling to himself at how soft and familiar this feels!]

[Mikleo has had a lot of time to remember, too. He's spent countless nights dreaming of laying beneath a sky so filled with endless stars, the darkness in between may as well have not existed. Hidden discoveries in temples so ancient they don't have a name. The scent of old tobacco in the old man's pipe. The feeling of dusty pages beneath their fingertips as they pored over the Celestial Record.

He isn't that boy anymore, and hasn't been for a long time, but the memories are so strong and so tangible that he simply can't speak at all. It comes back to him as a flood, his mind filling in the rest of the blanks: Sorey as he smiled up at them, and Mikleo floated away; Sorey's sad expression when he thought no one was looking; the knot between the Shepherd's brows when he thought he could get away with making decisions for Mikleo. And the two of them standing atop a grassy cliff in the same sunny spot, with all of Glenwood rolling out beneath them, half-shrouded in fog.

He remembers that last night, too.

I forget who said it. That there are as many emotions as stars in the sky. I can totally see that. Sorey had often looked at the sky while they journeyed.

A metaphor for how each emotion sparkles in its own way, huh? Must’ve been a romantic who came up with that one. (Mikleo hadn't been looking at the sky at all.)

There is no doubt that the man before him is his Sorey, even with his soft hands and the slightly sharper lines of his silhouette. He might not recall everything about Mikleo but it's enough, it's enough, and the slight trembling of his pale hands tells everything in his heart. But the seraph can't move. He's paralyzed, head bowed, his feet rooted in place by the appearance of the person he's been missing for years.

He can only stand there silently as tears roll down his cheeks.]

Edited (SRY IM DONE I SWEAR) 2023-03-05 17:17 (UTC)

[Sorey might not remember, not as completely, but he does remember how important Mikleo is to him. So, to feel his hands tremble with emotion, head bowed and tears streaking his pretty face, the brunet can only act on instinct. Gently, he pulls the seraph into a tight hug.]

I'm here.

[A simple reassurance, yet it carries so much emotion between them in this moment. He's here. They've found each other. Sorey's missed him so much. He's missed that close friendship, the friend who never made fun of him for his interests. In a way, part of Slade had been jealous that Sorey had a friend who didn't do something so cruel. Since then, he's made his peace with that side and has accepted the experience for what it is. He's grown wiser for it, and that makes it valuable.

Maybe with Mikleo's help, Sorey can make peace with the entirety of his past life; with the guilt that even though he'd done everything he could, the world still found its end and it may have been his fault. In part or in full. Everything must die, but he'll never know for sure if the end for his world had been a natural one or artificially hastened.]

[The hug tugs him right out of the torrent of memories and back into the present where he belongs. He makes a small, pathetic noise like a gasp, only to have it hijacked for a sob. He hates how weak he sounds. He's always tried to—he's always been one to hold it together, to support Sorey and show him the way and not to falter himself, but damn it he has feelings too, and he can't run away from them any longer. Not when the center of his universe has him in such inescapable gravity.

He doesn't resist as much as he'd love to, just buries his face into that warm shoulder, those welcoming arms; his pale fingers feel so small, worried into the front of his shirt as they are. He's waited so long. That loss has become part of him, engraved on his heart as much as his love and his patience, and the promise that they would meet once again.

And they have. Another life, another world, but the same love.

How foolish he's been.

He doesn't sob like that again, but he's still tearful and sniffly enough that he doesn't want to come up for air yet. It's only a minute later that he wriggles a little so he can say something against Sorey's shoulder.]

You're here.

[He can't look up at that sweet face just yet.]

... Sorry. I said all that stuff about us being different people, but it—it always hurt the same.

[Sorey feels his heart hurt for Mikleo when he hears that sob. He rubs at the seraph's back soothingly. Perhaps in the past he's always relied on his friend for his stalwart support, but the brunet wants to show him that he can do that for Mikleo, too. He can be a strong pillar to lean against when it's too much.

The brunet starts to hum softly, like his mom used to do whenever he got scared or extremely upset. Even as a teenager, she'd do that for him. Sometimes, a hug and a song help to soothe one's broken heart. He just hopes that Mikleo can use this as a soothing balm.

He only stops his humming when Mikleo addresses him. His voice is gentle when he speaks in answer.]

How can I blame you for hurting? I mean... I missed you, too. Even with my incomplete memories, I felt your absence all the same.

[The humming is so cute... and it does help calm him down. He finally lets go of Sorey's shirt so he can wipe his tears on the backs of his hands. He doesn't try to break away, however. He doesn't want this moment to end, not yet.

His friend's voice is so soft and gentle that it makes him ache. He feels cursed and blessed all at the same time-- blessed to have him, cursed to know that this happiness wasn't fated for them in the last world... or at least, he doesn't remember a happy ending. Or an ending at all.

He breathes in, steadies himself, and finally looks up. His fuchsia eyes are terribly wet, even for a water seraph.]

I keep thinking that I should have been there. Whatever you were going through, whatever happiness or pain you felt, I should have shared it with you. Instead I was halfway across the world, gallivanting around ruins and wondering why I always kept looking over my shoulder like I'd see someone.

[He swallows hard.]

I still want... this. Whether it's getting to know you all over again, or picking up where we left off or somewhere in between—I want you in my life, as long as you want to be in mine.

[His fuchsia eyes are still as beautiful as he remembers. More so in that he's seeing them for real, but... bad thoughts. Sorey isn't completely sure that there isn't someone else in Mikleo's life. The man deserves whoever he wants to bring him the joy he deserves, even if it's not Sorey.

Still, seeing how watery his eyes are, the brunet reaches into his pocket and pulls out a handkerchief, offering it to Mikleo. He's... learned to carry them around, just in case.]

Heh, I don't know where we left off, to be honest. I think it'd be a disservice to ourselves if we continue to live as if we were in the past. [Yet, he's still smiling.] Let's get to know each other as we are. I want you in my life, absolutely, but I want to learn who you are in this life. I want to celebrate your differences from the seraph I knew.

[A touch of sadness reaches his green eyes.]

I mean, it's only fair, isn't it? I'm sure I'm not exactly the Sorey you remember. I was born Slade Shepard in London, after all, not Sorey from Elysia.

[Mikleo almost chuckles at the appearance of the handkerchief. What a gentleman. He takes it, but as he wipes his eyes dry he realizes just how much it smells like Sorey. Distracting, definitely.]

Sorey...

[He's not wrong. It's hard to tell where they left off when neither of them fully remember. Even with all that Mikleo's gained, he feels there's so much more he's lost in the shuffle of souls from one world to another.

Sorey's eyes look so sad, vivid green and soft, that Mikleo turns the kerchief to another side and dabs at their corners.]

I'm not just Mikleo from Elysia, either. [He tucks the handkerchief back into Sorey's pocket.] I was born Nagawa Miyuki from Sapporo.

[And then, with a little twinkle of mischief in his eyes:]

Mikki, if you're close.

[He did say he might confess his childhood nickname one day.]

[Sorey's surprised by the gesture, but he allows it and he absolutely blushes a little when Mikleo returns his handkerchief so... personally. Still, he can't help grinning a little.]

Mikki. That's such a cute name for you. Though, I think Miyuki suits you best.

[How can it not when Mikleo's as beautiful and dangerous as snow?]

My family's the only ones who call me Slade anymore, but I think I can make an exception for you, Mikki.

I had an Utada Hikaru phase, which didn't help. [Hikki... Mikki... one can see how that happened. His tears forgotten momentarily, he is still soaking in that sunny warmth he's been missing, but remembers.]

I think I like Sorey the most. That's what you chose, isn't it?

[He smiles slightly, as if reflecting the light Sorey sheds with his own.]

If you ever decide you're tired of it, I can share my true name with you. One half for each of us.

I just call that good taste, personally.

[Sorey at least understands the importance of a seraph sharing their true name. He's surprised that Mikleo is so willing to share his with the brunet. He's unsure what he's done to earn that level of trust.]

I'll let you know when that day comes. First, I want to feel like I've earned it, or remember it on my own if you've told me.

[He smiles.]

It's only fair, right?

I'll take that. [Similar tastes in music, huh... can't be too surprised.

Mikleo can't unshare his name, not that he'd want to. Sorey will remember it at some point. This is his Sorey, and he is Sorey's Mikleo, and much like gravity these are firm laws of the universe.]

Of course you've earned it—it's always been yours, if you wanted it. [Don't you dare start getting down on yourself, Sorey. He will aggressively love you until you love yourself.] But I'll give you a chance to remember on your own. I remember... in that other world, you always liked having a chance to figure out the problem before I gave you a hint. And you weren't bad at it, as I recall.

[He reaches up and boops Sorey's nose with his fingertip harmlessly.]

... One day, you'll be ready. I'll be waiting for that day no matter how long it takes. You're worth the wait, always.

[Sorey laughs at that.]

Yeah, that part definitely hasn't changed. I still like trying to figure it out on my own first before asking for help.

[His expression is like a shocked puppy at his nose being booped. Then, slowly, there's a warm, gentle smile.]

I hope I don't keep you waiting too long, then. Thanks, Mikki.

[Oh no. Oh no. Mikleo has made a mistake, because Sorey can see how much he's blushing, now. Is it the nickname or the smile? Could be both. He looks away and clears his throat.]

Don't worry about it. I can be very patient when I need to be.

[He's waited this long. What's a few days or weeks or months more?]

We should get started on that meal before you die of hunger in my apartment. [He reluctantly steps away, but they'll probably be shoulder to shoulder in the kitchen anyway; it's not a big deal. He grabs a pot and a big skillet from a cupboard, fills the former with water, and sets them on the stove.]

[He'll get there in time. Though, seeing how embarrassed Mikleo's gotten, he's wondering if maybe he's overstepped with his nickname being used like that. Yet, the seraph changes the subject before Sorey can ask.]

Um, sure!

[The brunet helps to make a delicious shepherd's pie and, honestly, it's a really nice night to hang out with his newfound best friend.]

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